Damsel in Distress
by Diamondblade1
Summary: AU. Sequel of 'To Slay a Dragon'. Mayhem ensues when Rodney's sister and niece come to visit.


**Damsel in Distress**

It was a beautiful spring morning in the meadow. Flowers were blooming, the sky was a perfect blue, and a group of butterflies fluttered merrily across the emerald grass.

A sudden bellow from the hillside shattered the perfect stillness, prompting everything within hearing to flee – except for Sir Sheppard who hurried to investigate the source of the disruption.

"What do you mean she's coming here?" Rodney roared angrily from inside his cave.

John paused in his mad dash up the hill. It didn't sound as if Rodney was in any danger. Perhaps he should leave Katie the task of calming the dragon down…

The thunderclouds that were rapidly forming over the hilltop quickly changed his mind.

"She's your sister, Rodney," Katie argued loudly, enhancing her voice with magic in order to be heard over Rodney's rumbles of anger. "If you won't go see her, then she has to visit you."

"I visit her," Rodney protested loudly. John winced as the volume hurt his ears.

"You haven't seen her in twenty years!" Katie exclaimed equally as loudly, causing John to pause and wonder if keeping the peace was really all that important. Perhaps sending Ronon would be a better choice…except he was off gathering herbs with Teyla.

"She chased me off," Rodney pointed out crossly. "It's not like I would've really turned that English Dragon she married into a toadstool. Toadstools aren't that edible, for one thing."

"Well, she's coming to visit and you will be nice to her," Katie insisted firmly.

John finally reached the mouth of the cave and peered inside, being careful to check for signs of fireballs and lightening bolts before entering.

"What's the matter?" he asked somewhat reluctantly.

"Jeannie's coming here," Rodney announced unhappily.

John frowned. "Jeannie?" he asked, puzzled.

"His sister," Katie explained. She hesitated for a moment, and then continued quickly. "And his niece too."

Rodney choked at that. "Niece?" he managed to splutter.

"When will she be arriving?" John asked, trying to figure out whether he could convince Rodney to let him take some time off in the near future – preferably while Rodney's family was visiting.

Katie looked at him guiltily. "Um, this afternoon," she admitted.

John glanced warily at Rodney, expecting another outburst, but Rodney just groaned and buried his head in his forearms.

"Why didn't she give us a few days warning?" John asked curiously. He supposed that she may have been worried that Rodney would vanish for a couple of weeks.

To his surprise Katie glared at him. "It's not my fault that his sister flies faster than my pigeons."

"They'd probably fly faster if you hadn't instructed them to collect samples of various flowers along the way," Rodney pointed out, his voice muffled by his arms. "Then I'd at least have had a couple of days head start."

Katie patted his arm sympathetically. "It won't be so bad, Rodney. I'll keep Jeannie busy as much as possible, and it's only for a couple of days."

The morning passed surprisingly quickly. Rodney spent most of the time moping in his cave, and John spent most of it trying to find Ronon with the intention of leaving him in charge while John spent several days scouting the area for threats – primarily the area consisting of the Atlantis Inn and the nearby shops.

By the time Rodney's sister was spotted in the distance, John still hadn't found Ronon, and Rodney hadn't managed to convince Katie to transport him somewhere else – preferably somewhere far, far away.

Jeannie was slightly smaller than Rodney, with green-blue scales. John was more interested in the tiny dragonet accompanying her – Rodney's niece Madison.

Katie had told him that Madison was 15 years old, which hadn't sounded too bad – until Rodney had morbidly explained that she was about the equivalent of five in human years. The little dragon was excitedly flapping around the clearing, exclaiming loudly with every discovery she made.

She was especially thrilled to meet 'Uncle Roddy' as she called him, and clamoured happily onto his back where she perched regally like a little queen, much to Jeannie's amusement and Rodney's horror.

John was standing close enough to hear him hiss at Katie, "Do something!"

"Don't worry," Katie reassured him quietly. "I have it all planned out."

Katie's plan turned out to be a shopping trip into Athos for the following morning.

John felt obliged to point out that a dragon wouldn't exactly blend in with the crowd.

"Jeannie can take human form," Katie explained to him patiently.

John considered that titbit of information for a moment. "What about you?" he asked Rodney. "Can you become human too?"

Rodney shook his head. "No, and why would I want to anyway? Being a dragon is far superior to being a human."

John opened his mouth to protest, and then thought better of it. Working for Rodney had taught him that it was important to pick your arguments – and sometimes it was best not to argue with beings that tended to breathe fire when they were upset.

"What about Madison?" he asked instead.

Jeannie shook her head. "She's too young. But I'll sure she'll have fun with Rodney for the day – she's been wanting to meet him for years."

Rodney choked at that, and John watched in alarm as the dragon turned an unhealthy shade of white. "You want me to mind Madison?" Rodney finally managed to gasp in alarm.

Jeannie nodded. "She won't be any trouble. I'm sure that the two of you will have lots of fun. Just make sure that she eats lunch, alright?" And with that she kissed Madison goodbye and disappeared into the forest with Katie, leaving Rodney staring after them in speechless horror.

John decided that this would be a good time to make his escape. "I'll go do a perimeter check," he announced softly, and hurriedly started towards the forest.

A large claw swiftly impeded his progress.

"Not so fast," Rodney growled firmly. "You're going to help me look after Madison."

"I'm your bodyguard, not a babysitter," John protested.

"Right. And Jeannie will kill me if anything happens to Madison, so by helping keep an eye on her, you're protecting me," Rodney replied firmly.

John sighed. This hadn't been in the job description.

They managed to distract Madison with a puzzle Rodney had made in his spare time – a complication tangle of twisted metal. John had managed to solve the first one that Rodney had given him, but the second one was currently been used as a doorstop.

Ronon had discovered a simple solution to his – he'd simply chopped it in half with his sword and freed the ring from the remains. Rodney hadn't bothered giving him a second one.

About half an hour later John remarked that Madison was being rather quiet…which was probably because she was nowhere to be found.

Rodney practically turned his cave, John's cottage, Teyla's cave and the surrounding countryside upside down looking for her.

"Don't worry," John said soothingly, trying to calm the overwrought dragon. "She's probably just playing hide and seek in the nearby woods. I'm sure she'll come back when she's hungry."

Rodney looked at him in disbelief. "She's not a dog," he said tiredly. "And what if she's lost? We have to go look for her."

"I'll stay here in case she comes back," John volunteered cheerfully.

Rodney glared at him. "Aren't you supposed to be eager to rescue damsels in distress?" he remarked pointedly.

John scowled. Damsels in distress were a real nuisance – first you had to rescue them, then you had to rescue yourself from their marriage plans.

'I'll give you another piece of the map," Rodney offered.

John cheered up at that. Rodney had gotten tired of John getting lost whenever he decided to try and find the Nymphs Glen, so he'd drawn up a large detailed map, and then proceeded to cut it into very small pieces, which he kept to bribe John with.

So far John had part of a stream, a boulder and some unrecognisable fuzzy green stuff.

"If I was a baby dragon, where would I be?" John mused to himself as he traipsed further into the forest. A muttered curse followed by a loud thud behind him told him that Rodney had managed to get stuck between two trees again, and had dealt with the problem in his usual forward manner – he'd simply knocked one of the trees over. John was beginning to understand why the trees immediately surrounding the cave and clearing weren't very dense.

"Couldn't we get Katie to scry Madison's location for us?" John suggested suddenly, his mind helpfully supplying visions of the witch finding the dragonet and bringing her home while he got to relax for a change.

"No," Rodney replied shortly. "Katie's with Jeannie, so unless you're volunteering to tell her that we managed to lose her daughter in less than an hour…"

John winced at the mental image. On second thoughts, it was such a lovely day for a walk in the woods.

"Duck!" Rodney exclaimed suddenly. John was barely out of the way before a wave of fire blasted its way over him. "Got him," Rodney said with a grin.

John quickly checked his hair for any sign of singeing. "Got what?" he asked, once he'd reassured himself that his hair was fine.

"A Wraith," Rodney explained. A look of horror passed over his face. "You don't think that Madison might have been taken by a Wraith, do you?"

John shook his head. "No, they seem to avoid dragons."

"That's because they hate fire," Rodney explained distractedly, peering around the forest for any sign of a baby dragon.

John was relieved when they finally found one of Madison's footprints. At the rate Rodney was going he was beginning to worry that there wouldn't be much of the forest left by the time that they located Madison.

"Are you sure that it's hers?" Rodney asked doubtfully, peering at the strange shaped footprint.

John sighed. "Unless you have some offspring running around here that I don't know about, then yes, it's definitely hers."

Rodney glared at him, and then sniffed carefully at Madison's footprint, trying to catch her scent. "This would be a lot easier with a tracking device," he muttered tiredly.

"This would be a lot easier with Puddlejumper," John sighed to himself.

"How could your horse help find Madison?" Rodney asked curiously.

John looked at him in surprise. He'd forgotten how good Rodney's hearing was. "Because then I would be able to ride instead of running to keep up with you all the time," he replied. Dragons were surprisingly fast when sufficiently motivated.

Rodney frowned. "I thought Knights were supposed to be fit," he pointed out.

"Hey, I'm fit," John protested defensively. "You've just got longer legs."

"Some bodyguard you are," Rodney muttered crossly. "Come on, she went this way."

They hadn't gone very far when a distant high pitched wail drifted across the forest.

John froze in alarm, causing him to nearly be trampled by Rodney. "Is that Madison?" he asked Rodney who was looking around in panic for the source of the noise.

"I'm not sure," Rodney replied worriedly. "I've never heard a dragon make a noise like that before, but then I tend to avoid kids whenever possible."

John nodded. "We better go check it out," he decided, setting off in a jog towards the source of the noise.

Rodney reluctantly followed, his tail twitching from side to side in agitation – like a large cat that was clearing a wide path through the forest. John noted the destruction with considerable dismay – he was supposed to protect the countryside, after all. On the bright side however, Rodney was creating a nice shortcut to Athos…

The wails grew louder as they neared a clearing that had a tall abandoned tower standing in the middle of it. They paused at the foot of the tower and peered up at the crumbling masonry.

"I think it's coming from up there," Rodney remarked, gesturing at a tiny window at the very top of the tower.

John sighed. "I suppose we should investigate in case Madison decided to climb up there," he said, eyeing the unstable structure with considerable distaste.

"Good idea," Rodney agreed. "Off you go then."

"Hey, she's your niece," John pointed out. "Why don't you climb up there?"

"Because I wouldn't fit inside," Rodney replied cheerfully. "Besides, you're the Knight, this is the sort of thing you're supposed to do."

Grumbling, John cautiously made his way inside the tower. This was why people had squires, after all.

The stairs were old and crumbling, and John had to grasp the metal railings carefully to prevent himself from falling. Rodney didn't help much – he kept calling out every couple of minutes to see if John had reached to top yet. After the first ten times John simply ignored him.

The room at the top was dimly lit – the light from the window blocked by the form of a lady. She turned at the sound of John's footstep upon the wooden floor, and he was amazed by her beauty.

She was deathly pale, with long straight hair that flowed over her shoulders and down her back. Her figure was perfect, and her smile undiminished by her lack of colour.

"Welcome," she said, her voice high in pitch but with warm undertones. "I am Chaya."

John smiled at her in return, then frowned as the room darkened, obscuring his view of the lady. Glancing at the window he was startled to find a large blue eye staring in at him.

"Rodney?" he asked in alarm. "Is that you?"

The eye blinked at him. "Of course it's me, you idiot," Rodney replied, sounding affronted. "Who else would be hovering outside a window a hundred feet above the ground?"

"What are you doing up here?" John asked, momentarily forgetting about the pale lady.

"Looking for you," Rodney replied briskly. "You stopped replying, so I thought you may have hurt yourself."

"Why couldn't you have flown up here in the first place?" John complained. Tall towers had a lot of stairs.

"You should've thought of it sooner," Rodney replied. "Now stop flirting with that banshee and help look for Madison. Jeannie will be back from Athos soon."

John glanced at Chaya in surprise. Banshee? "We're looking for a young dragon," he explained to her politely. "Have you seen her?"

Chaya considered the question and then nodded solemnly. "She passed by here not long ago," she replied. "I believe she was heading towards the lake."

"Thank you, beautiful maiden," John replied gallantly, ignoring Rodney rolling his eye in disgust. "Perhaps you would be so kind as to help us find the one we seek?"

The banshee shook her head sadly. "I cannot leave," she replied woefully. "It is against the rules."

"Rules?" John asked in bewilderment. "Since when do Banshees have rules?"

"Oh, who cares?" Rodney interrupted impatiently. "If you don't head down now John, I'll try that transportation spell that Katie's being trying to teach me. You remember what happened to the potatoes?"

John winced at the memory. The sack of potatoes that Rodney had been practising on had appeared several feet above the village mayor, Kavanagh, and gravity had done the rest. Rodney swore that it had been an accident; abet one that he wasn't all that sorry about – beyond the loss of the potatoes.

Needless to say, Kavanagh had been less than amused.

After John had regretfully bid farewell to Chaya, they headed towards the lake in pursuit of Madison.

"Doesn't she ever get tired?" grumbled Rodney as they tramped through a small swamp. "At this rate she'll reach the next country before we catch up."

"Maybe she takes after you?" John suggested. "You never seem to sleep."

"I nap once or twice every century," Rodney protested. "That's more than enough sleep."

"Right," John said doubtfully.

Breaking through the tree line, they found themselves on the edge of the Quantum Lake. Legend had it that if one was to dive too deeply into its depths they would emerge in a strange world that was like reality, but warped in unexpected ways.

John had never felt the inclination to find out whether this was true, since the lake was inhabited by a large monster that didn't particularly like to share his territory.

Looking around, John noticed a trail of footsteps running along the edge of the lake. He pointed them out to Rodney, who hurriedly followed them halfway around the lake where they disappeared into the water.

"She must've gone for a swim," John said in concern. "Doesn't she know about the monster?"

"Sam?" Rodney asked distractedly. "I think Katie may have told her about him."

"You don't think he might've eaten her?" John asked in horror.

Rodney snorted in laughter. "Sam's a herbivore. He lives off the plants at the bottom of the lake. I'm just concerned about where she's gone now."

John sighed in relief. He didn't really fancy the idea of trying to guard Rodney against Jeannie's wrath if her daughter had been eaten by a monster.

"Well, I'm not walking all the way around the lake in search of footprints," he told Rodney firmly.

"Amusing as that'd be to watch, we don't have the time," Rodney replied as he launched himself off the ground with several flaps of his powerful wings.

John watched as he circled the lake, checking the ground for signs of Madison. John was careful to keep an eye on the lake while he waited – herbivore or not, the monster was rumoured to be at least twice the size of Rodney, and Rodney was about the size of a small house.

Finally Rodney landed with a rush of air and a heavy thump. "This way," he said slightly breathlessly. "The tracks lead into the forest toward Ogre territory."

"I haven't fought any Ogre's for a while," John remarked. "This should be fun."

"It'll be far from fun if we don't find Madison and get her home before Jeannie notices that she's missing," Rodney pointed out anxiously.

John sighed. "Fine. I'll keep the Ogre slaying to a minimum."

Rodney ignored him in favour of jogging towards the tree line as quickly as possible, leaving John to try and avoid getting knocked over by Rodney's tail.

They happened upon an Ogre not long after they re-entered the forest. He was standing in the middle of a clearing and looking decidedly unnerved.

John drew his sword. "I've come to rescue the fair maiden from your foul clutches," he announced dramatically.

The Ogre glanced at him in annoyance. "Oh is she yours then? It's about time you showed up. The nasty beast won't let me leave," he complained, pointing to a leafy bush.

John looked at the bush doubtfully and then back at the Ogre. "The bush won't let you leave?" he asked sceptically.

Rodney wandered over and poked the bush with one claw. It erupted into a flurry of shining scales that dived on Rodney.

"Uncle Roddy," Madison yelled gleefully, scrambling onto his back. "I had the bestest adventure. I went exploring and I found lots of neat places. And I captured this monster too. Do you think Mum will let me keep it?"

"I doubt it," Rodney said firmly, gesturing at the Ogre to escape while Madison was distracted. "In fact, I think it should be a secret. How about we keep this little adventure a secret between the three of us, hmm?"

Madison considered this, and then nodded. "Alright," she said. "Secrets are fun."

Rodney sighed in relief. "We have to go home now," he told Madison. "Your Mum will be back soon."

"Okay," she agreed sleepily, curling up on his back.

John glanced at the sky in concern. "I don't think we're going to make it back in time," he noted. "Remember how long it took to get here?"

"It won't take long if we fly," Rodney pointed out. "We're not that far from the cave."

"I can't fly," John pointed out. "And if you even think of leaving me to walk back alone I'll quit."

Rodney sighed. "Fine, climb on my back and I'll carry you back. But don't expect me to do this ever again."

John nodded cheerfully and clamoured onto Rodney's back. The scales were rather slippery and he had to grip tightly in order to prevent himself from falling off.

"Ready?" Rodney asked impatiently as John tried to find a comfortable way to sit on a dragon's back.

Giving it up as a lost cause, John nodded and held on firmly as Rodney launched into the air with both Madison and John on his back.

They arrived back in the clearing minutes before Jeannie and Katie returned, chatting merrily.

"Did you have a good time with Uncle Rodney?" Jeannie asked Madison, giving her a big hug.

Madison nodded happily. "It was great. Uncle Roddy let me have heaps of fun," she replied gleefully.

"Oh? What did you get up to?" Jeannie asked her with a smile, fortunately not noticing Rodney's alarmed expression, and John's subtle shift towards the relative safety of the trees.

"It's a secret," Madison told her solemnly.

Jeannie nodded in amusement. "Well, I glad you had fun. See, I told you she'd be no trouble," she remarked to Rodney and John. "Perhaps next time you won't be so reluctant to look after her."

Rodney and John looked at one another in horror.

Once Jeannie had finally left to return home, and Rodney had promised to visit her sometime sooner than twenty years, they settled down outside Rodney's cave to relax after a stressful couple of days.

"Katie," Rodney said with a toothy smile. "Would you help me master that transportation spell?"

Katie looked surprised. "Certainly," she replied, "but I thought that you didn't think it was worth the bother of learning?"

"I think I've found a use for it," Rodney replied cheerfully. To John he muttered quietly, "I hear that Greenland is nice and far away."

Ronon and Teyla finally turned up a week later – it turned out that Ronon had proposed and Teyla had decided they should have a tropical holiday to celebrate.

John didn't want the Banshee getting too lonely, so he made sure to visit her every now and then – making sure to plug his ears with moss first.

Rodney decided that his sister mightn't feel inclined to visit in a hurry if he actually wrote occasionally, so he borrowed several of Katie's pigeons – with the solemn promise not to eat any of them – and made sure to send Jeannie regular letters.

Madison kept her adventure a secret, though she maintained that John and Uncle Roddy were the bestest babysitters ever.

And so the peace remained.


End file.
